Getting better at anything requires us to “grow”. Sometimes this can feel challenging, however. Uncertainty, lack of a plan for getting there, or even an idea of what exactly your specific growth area would be can all create barriers to creating that growth and improvement. The mind can often be the greatest barrier to getting better.
WellPerformance uses a specific system that isn’t complicated - which doesn’t mean it’s always easy – in order to move our clients along the path of change and growth. Here it is:
3-Step sequence for identifying and addressing our clients’ “Zone of Growth”
1) Awareness
2) Acceptance
Self-Tools and External Tools
3) Take Action (or Inaction)
The Process:
1) Awareness – Using open ended questioning that guides client to becoming aware of the challenge area(s) and their consequences.
Zoom out: "If I don't change/improve this now, what will my career most likely continue to be?"
Understanding the impact of NOT addressing = motivation
2) Acceptance - Acceptance requires humility and self-compassion.
"The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change."
– Carl Rogers
Acceptance does not mean that we give up/in, it just means that we acknowledge our current reality.
This step is often skipped because it can be painful to own our “zones of growth” – especially for high-achievers. However, without acceptance of what is we will most likely continue to have similar issues/problems.
If we are not aware and/or have not accepted our “zone for growth” we simply cannot change.
2.5)* Create emotional distance from the Acceptance Stage before moving on to Step 3.
First, we do non-jargon/real-world education with client on the brain and our survival instinct.
Then we utilize two avenues to create change/growth:
Resources - Mental training interventions (Self-tools and External tools)
Self-tools (called “self” because we teach them to practice these on their own daily):
- Journaling
- Mindfulness meditation
- Tactical breathwork
The goal is regulation of your emotions and most importantly, the Central Nervous System (CNS).
External tools (external because they are done with someone else):
- 1:1 Sessions (Sport/Performance Psychologist, MPC)
- Team/Group Sessions
- Talking with trusted and skilled mentors
The goal is outside perspective/reflection, accountability, challenge, and shared self-exploration. Shining a light on how perception (flawed thinking pattern) is often limited, distorted, or “off” altogether.
Step 3 – Planning for Action and/or Inaction
Once regulated (or at least improved), we can work towards deciding: What can I do about it? What do I need to let go of? What new daily habits can I build?
Or…sometimes the most powerful action is inaction, life has a way of providing clarity when we let things run their course (sleep on it). “What happens if I just decide to let the “thing” go?”
Bottom line is that we all can change/grow, but we first must have awareness followed by acceptance. Without these two steps growth is unlikely. Lastly, it isn’t impossible to do this process on our own, but it is very challenging. Using a skilled professional is our best pathway to the growth we want!
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Stuart Singer, M.Ed., and PsyD is the Director of WellPerformance, a Mental Performance Coaching and Consulting practice, and the creator of the DoSo app https://t.co/R61vbpda4X . For more information regarding this topic, he can be contacted at ssinger@wellperformancecoach.com or follow him on X: @wellperformance, or Instagram: @wellperformance
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